Daily Archive

For if you forgive men when they sin against you, your heavenly Father will also forgive you. But if you do not forgive men their sins, your Father will not forgive your sins. Matthew 6:14-15

When we’ve been hurt by someone it can take away a part of who we are. In some cases it’s a relatively mild thing. Our feelings are hurt by some sarcastic comment or a ‘friend’ tells us their opinion about something dear to us and it hurts.

In other cases, the violation of who we are is much more severe. We come home and find our home broken into and several things of emotional and physical value taken. Our spouse or significant other is caught in, or confesses to, an affair. We are the victim of assault, rape or domestic abuse.

These and many other things can attack the core of who we are. For that reason, and many others, forgiveness is tough. Somewhere along the line we’ve come to believe that forgiveness says, ‘What you did to me is okay’ or ‘I probably deserved all I got and more’ or a variety of other self-defamatory responses.

None of these things are true of course. Being hurt is never okay. Broken trust is, in some cases, impossible to mend. But forgiveness isn’t about justifying the actions of another person. Nor is forgiveness about condoning the attack. Forgiveness is about our own personal freedom. Forgiveness says, ‘I will not allow you to continue to control my emotions and my feelings about myself. I’m okay. I’m made in God’s image. Your actions against me were wrong, but I will not dwell on them. I will not allow your pain to cripple me for the rest of my life. I’m releasing you into the hands of God.’

Jesus often talked about forgiveness during His ministry on earth. In Matthew He states that we are to forgive others in order for God to forgive us. Forgiveness of our sins against God is forgiven only because of Jesus. Forgiveness can come no other way and by no action of our own.

Forgiveness of others is a choice. We have the power to make a decision to forgive others. We may not have the power to complete the process, but God’s Holy Spirit will help us with that.

Our refusal to forgive others is our choice. Much as He would like to intervene in the process, God has no choice but to allow us to choose to be unforgiving. He has no choice but to allow the consequences of unforgiveness (bitterness, anger, hatred, broken relationship) to plague us throughout our lives.

Forgiveness isn’t an attack on our personal integrity but being unforgiving is. Lifestyle forgiveness is a character trait that says “I will not allow the hurt you have brought into my life to affect how I feel about myself, others or even you. In the power of the Holy Spirit I am freeing myself of your control.”

PRAYER: Father God. I confess to you that I am struggling with hatred, bitterness and anger over the hurt that others have caused me in my past and present. I ask that your Holy Spirit would empower me to be able to forgive those who have hurt me so that I can live free of the bitterness, anger and hatred that are controlling me. Thank you that you love me just as I am. I’m your child. I will go forth this day free of the control that has bound me. Thank you Jesus. Amen.