You are currently browsing the tag archive for the ‘bitterness’ tag.
God is not unjust; he will not forget your work and the love you have shown him as you have helped his people and continue to help them. Hebrews 6:10
There are perhaps few things in life more frustrating than when our work and good deeds go unappreciated. You work hard to get it ‘just right’. You tend to every detail and make sure all is in place for a successful day or event. For all your hard labors you get the ‘know-it-all’ who manages to see every flaw or, in Christian love of course, tells you how you can do it better ‘next time.’
In the meantime you walk away thinking, ‘There will NEVER be a next time. Why do I do this?”
Then there are the people that completely misinterpret your intentions. The see everything you do as an attempt to elevate yourself when you were really trying to be the servant Christ called each of us to be.
If you are someone who works to serve people, especially people in ministry, teachers or parents, you know the feeling. Like the little red hen you work hard and feel all alone and unappreciated in your labors. God’s word offers hope for you. The writer to the Hebrews reminds each of us that God is a just God. Don’t read Hebrews 6:10 so quickly as to miss the nugget of truth and encouragement: “He will not forget your work!” Others will miss it, critique it, tear it apart or find ways to do it better. God remembers.
It may not be this week. It may not be next year. It may not even be until you are able to see Him face to face. But someday your labor will be rewarded. Don’t grow weary in the battle. When you do things for others and feel unappreciated try to remember that you are really doing those things for Jesus.
But there is a double edge to God’s sword of justice and it’s one of the painful, but real, parts of scripture. God’s justice works both ways. If you are living for him and obeying Him; if your relationship with Him is growing through prayer, Bible study and personal and corporate worship and you are being mistreated, his justice will be sure.
On the other hand, if you harbor unconfessed sin in your life. If you are refusing to forgive someone or are angry, bitter or resentful towards others, then God’s justice may work against you.
It’s important for us as, especially as Christ-followers, to remember that sees life and justice differently than we do. God’s view of justice has more to do with bringing us into right relationship with Him than it does making us feel comfortable and appreciated.
If we are harboring sin, doubt, worry, anger, bitterness or resentment in our hearts, He will do whatever He needs to do to bring us into right relationship and obedience to Him. He isn’t concerned about yesterday. If you have made a mistake yesterday (or in your past) ask for confess it to Him, ask for forgiveness and rely on His Holy Spirit to move on. Then, forget about the mistake.
The double-edged sword of God’s justice is this. No matter where you are in life, you will encounter those who hate you, mistreat you and misunderstand your motives. When that happens do a spiritual self-examination. If your heart is right with God remember He looks at your heart and knows your true motives. If you find some way in which you have transgressed, ask forgiveness and move on. Either way, God’s justice is fair, true and loving. Rely on Him for today.
PRAYER: Father God, I confess to you that many of the things I’m dealing with are a result of poor choices and my rebellion towards your ways. I ask you to show me where I’ve failed and then help me to grow in relationship with you. During those times when others wrongfully accuse or misunderstand me I pray for your strength and encouragement to move on. In Jesus name I pray, Amen.
So do not throw away your confidence; it will be richly rewarded. You need to persevere so that when you have done the will of God, you will receive what he has promised. Hebrews 10:35-36
During New Testament times the most cherished and protected item of a soldier’s armor was his shield. Those who lost their shield, and survived, were humiliated and at times killed by their own men. In fact, it was nobler to be carried home dead on your shield than to return home healthy and minus the shield. The shield was more important than life itself!
The word picture that the writer to the Hebrews gives us of confidence is likened to the shield of battle. The faith we have in God should be the most important thing we possess. Our faith in Jesus should be so important that we are willing to set aside our own personal reputation and safety to protect it. Jesus was humiliated, rejected by family and friends, wrongfully accused and eventually murdered by the very people He came to save. In spite of all that pain, He believes in you!
To many people their faith is an add-on to life. Faith is fine to have when times are tough, but when times are good it’s not necessary. To some it’s even confining. When faith is nothing more than an add-on and adversity comes we’re faced with a dilemma. We blame ourselves and try harder to ‘be good’ but this leads to frustration because we aren’t perfect no matter how hard we try.
We blame others and become angry and bitter, but that really only leads to our own emotional prison. Anger and bitterness robs our joy and our strength and keeps us from experiencing the joy and freedom only Jesus can give.
We blame God when our prayers aren’t answered the way we want or ask. But God isn’t a vending machine. His promises aren’t for an easy life here on earth. Jesus warns us repeatedly that we will be faced with tribulation and pain throughout our lives.
When you encounter battles and trials in life, learn a lesson from the admonition of Hebrews. Don’t throw away your faith! It doesn’t matter who is at fault in the trials you are enduring. If it’s your past you can be forgiven. If you’ve suffered evil at the hands of others God can help you recover from the wounds. But if you lose your faith in God, then you are truly without hope. Faith in God through Jesus Christ is the only way we can endure the attacks that others put in our way.
Persevere. Be strong. Guard your heart from the enemy. Never grow tired in your quest to follow Christ. Trust Jesus to empower you through His Holy Spirit to work in your life for good. Regardless of how things look around you Jesus is in control and madly in love with you!
PRAYER: Father God, I praise You for the protection and strength You have promised through Jesus Christ. I confess to you that I’m struggling with the things that are going on around me. There are times when I feel completely overwhelmed by enemy attack. Help me to hold fast to the confidence I have that You are an all-powerful, loving God. Empower me by Your Holy Spirit to live a life of faith in the midst of struggle. Amen.
For if you forgive men when they sin against you, your heavenly Father will also forgive you. But if you do not forgive men their sins, your Father will not forgive your sins. Matthew 6:14-15
When we’ve been hurt by someone it can take away a part of who we are. In some cases it’s a relatively mild thing. Our feelings are hurt by some sarcastic comment or a ‘friend’ tells us their opinion about something dear to us and it hurts.
In other cases, the violation of who we are is much more severe. We come home and find our home broken into and several things of emotional and physical value taken. Our spouse or significant other is caught in, or confesses to, an affair. We are the victim of assault, rape or domestic abuse.
These and many other things can attack the core of who we are. For that reason, and many others, forgiveness is tough. Somewhere along the line we’ve come to believe that forgiveness says, ‘What you did to me is okay’ or ‘I probably deserved all I got and more’ or a variety of other self-defamatory responses.
None of these things are true of course. Being hurt is never okay. Broken trust is, in some cases, impossible to mend. But forgiveness isn’t about justifying the actions of another person. Nor is forgiveness about condoning the attack. Forgiveness is about our own personal freedom. Forgiveness says, ‘I will not allow you to continue to control my emotions and my feelings about myself. I’m okay. I’m made in God’s image. Your actions against me were wrong, but I will not dwell on them. I will not allow your pain to cripple me for the rest of my life. I’m releasing you into the hands of God.’
Jesus often talked about forgiveness during His ministry on earth. In Matthew He states that we are to forgive others in order for God to forgive us. Forgiveness of our sins against God is forgiven only because of Jesus. Forgiveness can come no other way and by no action of our own.
Forgiveness of others is a choice. We have the power to make a decision to forgive others. We may not have the power to complete the process, but God’s Holy Spirit will help us with that.
Our refusal to forgive others is our choice. Much as He would like to intervene in the process, God has no choice but to allow us to choose to be unforgiving. He has no choice but to allow the consequences of unforgiveness (bitterness, anger, hatred, broken relationship) to plague us throughout our lives.
Forgiveness isn’t an attack on our personal integrity but being unforgiving is. Lifestyle forgiveness is a character trait that says “I will not allow the hurt you have brought into my life to affect how I feel about myself, others or even you. In the power of the Holy Spirit I am freeing myself of your control.”
PRAYER: Father God. I confess to you that I am struggling with hatred, bitterness and anger over the hurt that others have caused me in my past and present. I ask that your Holy Spirit would empower me to be able to forgive those who have hurt me so that I can live free of the bitterness, anger and hatred that are controlling me. Thank you that you love me just as I am. I’m your child. I will go forth this day free of the control that has bound me. Thank you Jesus. Amen.
‘and forgive us our sins, as we have forgiven those who sin against us’. Matthew 6:12 (NLT)
“I forgive you”. Three of the toughest words we will ever say and perhaps the toughest to live out. There are sometimes when forgiveness is easy. Those times when someone does some small infraction that really had no effect on us. They feel far worse than we do. We forgive them, they feel better and that’s the end of it.
It’s those other times when forgiveness is tough. Those times when we’ve been let down by close friends or family. Once is hard, but then it happens over and over again and we begin to doubt their sincerity. They say they are sorry. They say they will try harder or they will ‘never do that again’ but the more they fail the less we believe their words.
There are times forgiveness seems to be completely impossible. You’ve been hurt. The hurt may be physical. The bruises will heal, but the trust has been broken. While physical hurt is painful, the real pain is in the emotions. Emotional scars heal much slower than physical. Sometimes emotional scars never heal. People you meet on the street everyday wear masks and smiles that hide unbearable pain. They are in the coffee shops and restraints. They are in the doctor’s office and the post office. They are in the schools and the churches. They bear the weight of emotional scars and the baggage of not being able to forgive and move on.
Forgiveness is toughest when it isn’t asked for. You’ve been hurt-badly. Once the physical pain is gone the emotional goes on. The perpetrator knows. He/she just doesn’t care. You are left in a pool of pain, sorrow, embarrassment and hurt. Forgiveness certainly isn’t warranted or deserved. It’s not even asked for! But if you don’t forgive, the pain grows like a painful, cancerous growth producing anger, bitterness and hate.
We don’t forgive others because they ask for it or even deserve it. We forgive to free ourselves from the pain. Forgiveness isn’t about them. It’s about you. To forgive the undeserving isn’t about reconciliation, it’s about freedom.
Jesus says we should pray: ‘and forgive us our sins, as we have forgiven those who sin against us’ Matthew 6:12 (NLT). To forgive as we’ve been forgiven! Some forgive conditionally: “If you do this again…”; Others forgive under obligation: “God said I have to forgive you, so I guess I do…”; Others forgive but reserve the right to remind you of this fault at a later, more convenient date.
Jesus says we are to forgive as He does. His forgiveness is complete. All we have to do is come to him, confess our faults and ask forgiveness. Then we move on, trusting His Holy Spirit to empower us to try harder. Sometimes we succeed. Sometimes we struggle and fail. Always we are forgiven by Him.
There are some people who have hurt you deeply. Forgiveness won’t come through your power. It won’t come overnight. It will some as you rely on God to empower you with the ability to let go of the pain caused by others and be free to let go. Forgiving doesn’t make you less of a person, it makes you more like Jesus.
PRAYER: Father God. You know my heart. There are people in my life that have hurt me deeply and continue to do so. I’m angry, I’m frustrated and bitter. I know I should forgive but have no power to do so. I want to be free of this pain. I want to let go and live more like Jesus. I confess my inability to you and ask you to forgive me. Empower me with your Spirit to forgive and live free of this burden. I Jesus name, Amen.
Make every effort to live in peace with all men and to be holy; without holiness no one will see the Lord. See to it that no one misses the grace of God and that no bitter root grows up to cause trouble and defile many. Hebrews 12:14-15
I knew a man who loved to talk about himself and others. When he talked about himself the comments were always positive. He apparently could do no wrong and was an unsung hero in many ways. On the other hand when he talked about others (except of course for those in hearing range) he could always find something wrong with what they did, say, or wore for clothing. No one else measured up to his standards.
Needless to say he didn’t have many friends. We’d sit at lunch during work and hope he didn’t sit at our table. One day he was going on and on about himself when another co-worker, a gentle, soft spoken and well respected believer in Jesus, came into the lunch room. He was still out of earshot when our ‘prophet’ said, “I don’t like him”. I was curious so I asked why he didn’t like that person and he replied, “I don’t know. I just don’t like him. Nice guy though.”
His statement made no sense, as was the case in many of his tirades, but his words stuck with me. The writer to the Hebrews tells us to live at peace with all people as much as is possible. The co-worker that entered the lunchroom that day, I’ll call him Jeff, did nothing to deserve the ‘prophets’ disdain. In fact, the ‘prophet’ even admitted his feelings were unwarranted.
Jeff had done ‘everything right’. He lived the Christian faith in a non-threatening, non-judgmental way. He wasn’t afraid to share his faith but he would far rather share it through actions than through words. He wasn’t always liked by people. But even those who disliked him could find no reason for accusation.
As a Christ-follower we each have an opportunity to share the love and grace of God to others by our actions. We may not always be accepted. Some will point out our weaknesses and failures and completely disregard the positive aspects of who we are. Our goal as Christ-followers is to live in such a way that others may not like us but will have no grounds for their negative feelings about us.
Live in such a way that you are the solution to the bitterness in people’s lives, not the cause.
PRAYER: Father God. I come to you today realizing that there are things in my life that have caused bitterness in the souls of other people. I confess this to you and ask that you would forgive me for the pain I’ve caused others even if they refuse to forgive me. From this day forward empower me with your Spirit to spread grace and love to those around me so that Christ will be glorified in me. In Jesus name I pray, Amen.
Mike Fisk & Built with Grace 