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Make every effort to live in peace with all men and to be holy; without holiness no one will see the Lord. See to it that no one misses the grace of God and that no bitter root grows up to cause trouble and defile many. Hebrews 12:14-15
I knew a man who loved to talk about himself and others. When he talked about himself the comments were always positive. He apparently could do no wrong and was an unsung hero in many ways. On the other hand when he talked about others (except of course for those in hearing range) he could always find something wrong with what they did, say, or wore for clothing. No one else measured up to his standards.
Needless to say he didn’t have many friends. We’d sit at lunch during work and hope he didn’t sit at our table. One day he was going on and on about himself when another co-worker, a gentle, soft spoken and well respected believer in Jesus, came into the lunch room. He was still out of earshot when our ‘prophet’ said, “I don’t like him”. I was curious so I asked why he didn’t like that person and he replied, “I don’t know. I just don’t like him. Nice guy though.”
His statement made no sense, as was the case in many of his tirades, but his words stuck with me. The writer to the Hebrews tells us to live at peace with all people as much as is possible. The co-worker that entered the lunchroom that day, I’ll call him Jeff, did nothing to deserve the ‘prophets’ disdain. In fact, the ‘prophet’ even admitted his feelings were unwarranted.
Jeff had done ‘everything right’. He lived the Christian faith in a non-threatening, non-judgmental way. He wasn’t afraid to share his faith but he would far rather share it through actions than through words. He wasn’t always liked by people. But even those who disliked him could find no reason for accusation.
As a Christ-follower we each have an opportunity to share the love and grace of God to others by our actions. We may not always be accepted. Some will point out our weaknesses and failures and completely disregard the positive aspects of who we are. Our goal as Christ-followers is to live in such a way that others may not like us but will have no grounds for their negative feelings about us.
Live in such a way that you are the solution to the bitterness in people’s lives, not the cause.
PRAYER: Father God. I come to you today realizing that there are things in my life that have caused bitterness in the souls of other people. I confess this to you and ask that you would forgive me for the pain I’ve caused others even if they refuse to forgive me. From this day forward empower me with your Spirit to spread grace and love to those around me so that Christ will be glorified in me. In Jesus name I pray, Amen.
Each heart knows its own bitterness, and no one else can share its joy. Proverbs 14:10
An old Native American saying goes something like this: “Never judge a man until you have walked two miles in his moccasins.” This saying should be the battle cry of each of us as we travel life’s journey. We should think twice, or even three times before we judge the attitudes and actions of other people. We may not like what we see. We may disagree completely with their response to events in their lives. But we should never make a judgment about why they are doing what they do.
God wired each of us differently. Parents know this. What other explanation is there for the way their children grow up? Two lives brought into the world by the same parents. Both have the same opportunities. Both have the same background experiences. Yet one child will grow up angry and the other patient and kind; one child will be a people person while the other is more of a social misfit; One will follow the rules while the other will seek every chance they get to break them; one will love and serve God while the other will reject faith.
No one reacts the same exact way to any situation. Yet we tend to expect that of people. If God works one way in your life, you expect Him to work the same way in someone else’s life. You may enjoy working with your hands while someone else enjoys office work or computer work. Is one better than the other? Is one more rewarding? To you maybe, but not to someone else.
Proverbs 14:10 reminds us of two great truths for Christ-followers. First of all, take great care in how you respond or react to someone’s actions or attitudes. You may see them as being inappropriate and they may be. But until you know the whole story, don’t assume you know the reason someone acts the way they do.
Secondly, remember that God knows your heart. Just as He expects us to be patient and understanding with those around us, He is patient and understanding towards us. He knows, better than anyone else, why you are struggling with whatever issue is troubling you today. He understands and desires to come close to you so that he can love you and encourage you.
There is a third lesson to learn from this proverb. The last phrase says: “no one else can share its joy”. There will be times when people will fail to understand why you are so happy. They may try to dispel that joy by pointing out the darkness and turmoil around you. Don’t allow them to keep you from living a life full of happiness and fulfillment. Joy isn’t about surroundings and circumstances. Joy is about inner peace that is only received through a relationship with Jesus Christ.
Your Heavenly Father loves you. Others will say they understand you, but God really does understand you. His sincere and passionate desire is for relationship with you. Don’t let others rob you of all that God has for you. Focus on Him. Your troubles may not disappear, but the inner peace you gain through Jesus will empower you through life’s distress.
PRAYER: Dear God. There are so many people telling me how I should feel. They tell me they understand, but they don’t. They aren’t even close. I thank and praise you for the truth that you do love me and understand me. You look on my heart and see my every emotion. You understand why I am the way I am. Guard me from losing the joy that I have in you. Protect me from those who want to rob me of my joy. Amen.
My guilt has overwhelmed me like a burden too heavy to bear. Psalm 38:4
Next to anger, guilt is perhaps the greatest crippler of all time. When you consider the fact that fear can often be caused by guilt that only adds to the drama! Guilt comes into our lives when we feel ashamed for an action that we’ve done. Sometimes that guilt is ‘warranted’ because we all make mistakes. Sometimes that guilt comes from the accusations of others. Even if we are innocent of the accusation we can feel guilty about it.
People try to deal with guilt in a variety of ways in order to ease the pain. Some try to ignore the guilt and pretend that whatever it is that makes us feel guilty never really happened. That’s called denial. If I ignore my guilt long enough it will be less painful. That’s not really true, but we believe the lie. Suppressing guilt only keeps it at bay for a time. Eventually it comes back with vengeance.
Others try to deal with guilt by soothing it with a variety of things like new relationships, new toys, new jobs or surroundings. We focus on external things in order to try to ignore the internal pain we feel. When we tire of the old things we simply replace them with new in hopes that we will be satisfied. Using denial and external things to try to cover up guilt never work.
Sometimes people use the ‘blame game’ to deal with their guilt. “Yes, I did that but if he/she hadn’t done this, or if she/he HAD done that, I wouldn’t have done what I did.” Placing blame on others takes the attention off of me and puts it on others. It’s like creating a diversion. The problem with this is that people eventually see though our antics and we end up being the only one that believes our story. People who use the blame game seldom realize that they are the main problem in the healing process.
Following ‘social trends’ rather than God’s Word can also be used to cover guilt. “Everyone else is doing it so it must be okay.” We surround ourselves with people who, like us, haven’t dealt with their guilt. Since they appear to be comfortable in what they do we feel comfortable as well. There is sort of a comfort in mutual misery.
Even religion can be used to cover guilt. We do something wrong and go to God for forgiveness. He willingly forgives us of all our sins. However, we feel so bad about what we have done that we try to do ‘things’ to cover the pain. These can be very good things like church attendance, Bible Studies, volunteering, even being in ministry to try to cover the shame and guilt of our sin. When we struggle with a recurring sin we tend to increase our ‘religious activity’ to deal with the pain. Nothing relieves that pain though and so we revert to the blame game. “It’s not working. It must be Gods fault, or the churches fault, or the fault of those so-called Christians.”
There is nothing you can do to free yourself of the weight of guilt you carry. The longer you carry it the heavier it grows. The more things you try to remove the guilt from your life the heavier your burden grows. The more you regret the more you fret. Sometimes people are so weighed down by the burden of trying to remove the guilt from their lives that they become physically, emotionally or mentally ill. Some even commit suicide to try to remove the pain.
Jesus has the answer to your guilt and the burden you carry. It’s not found in religion. It’s not found in church. It’s not found in relationships, toys or activity. Freedom from guilt comes through Jesus alone and the grace He offers. Hebrews 10:22 says “let us draw near to God with a sincere heart in full assurance of faith, having our hearts sprinkled to cleanse us from a guilty conscience and having our bodies washed with pure water.”
Jesus not only cleanses the sin, he wants to cleanse the feelings of guilt you carry. Satan and others will want to try to continually remind you of your past mistakes. Tell them that Jesus took care of that on the cross. When guilt attacks take it directly to Jesus. Let Him remind you that YOU ARE FORGIVEN. No questions. No second thoughts. NO MORE BLAME. Say to yourself, ‘Because of Jesus I am not only forgiven of my sin, I am cleansed of my guilt. I will no longer allow guilt to control me and weigh me down. I AM FREE.’
PRAYER: Dear Jesus. I thank you that you look on my heart and not on my actions. I am so sorry for the pain I’ve caused myself, others and you. I’ve made decisions that continue to be hurtful. I continue to struggle with sin. My guilt is ever before me. I ask that once and for all you search my heart and reveal any unconfessed sin. Then I pray that you not only forgive me of my sin, but that you cleanse my guilty conscience. Empower me to live free of guilt regardless of the number of times other people try to remind me of my past. From this day forward I resolve to rely on you to free me from guilt. Amen.
Jesus replied, “No one who puts his hand to the plow and looks back is fit for service in the kingdom of God.” Luke 9:62
There are certain stories in the Bible that require us to take a double take. When Abraham’s nephew Lot and his family were rescued by angels, they were told not to look back. When Lot’s wife stole a glance at the destruction going on in Sodom and Gomorrah she became a pillar of salt. God showed no mercy in this situation. We can’t really blame Lots wife from taking a look back. The fire that fell that day destroyed the lives of her family and friends. But God’s command was clear. Move on. No matter how much it hurts, it costs to follow me.
Thousands of years later, the Apostle Paul writes to the church in Philippi, “Brothers, I do not consider myself yet to have taken hold of it. But one thing I do: Forgetting what is behind and straining toward what is ahead, 14I press on toward the goal to win the prize for which God has called me heavenward in Christ Jesus.” Philippians 3:13-14. In the preceding verses what is he talking about? Suffering and sacrificing of all things.
One day Jesus was walking along the road. People came and proclaimed their intention to follow Him, but each one had a pre-requisite. Each had an area of their lives they wanted to hold back from Him. Theirs was not a complete allegiance but a convenient arrangement for their own good.
Grace is NOT free. Grace costs and costs dearly. It is free for us to take hold of, but that is only because the payment has been made on the Cross and is finalized through the empty tomb. Following Jesus isn’t easy. If anyone tells you that if you turn your life over to Jesus all your troubles will disappear….RUN! Following Christ may be the start of struggle.
First, you may be misunderstood by others. When you say you are a Christ-follower people may automatically assume that means you are perfect. Christ followers are NOT perfect. We are however forgiven. We may suffer, but our suffering is never as great as the suffering Jesus did for us on the cross. His suffering was physical (death) and emotional (deserted by family and friends) and spiritual (forsaken by God “My God, My God, Why have you forsaken me?”).
The second area of struggle may be the struggle of our own self-image. It’s human to base your self-worth on what you do for a living, the decisions you’ve made in the past, the opinions of others. It’s human, but not Christ-like. Our self-worth, our heritage and our future are not based on anything we can do in life. Who we are and what we are to become is based solely on who Jesus is and what we allow Him to accomplish during our short stay on this earth.
What do you need to walk away from today to sell out completely to Jesus? Is it a job? A Relationship? A habit? A church? Nothing on this earth is worth risking your walk with Jesus. Only through Him will you be able to break free.
The good news is that Jesus looks on the heart. He knows our faults. He knows our struggles. He knows our desires. He knows how hard it is to break free. That’s why He patiently, lovingly and graciously empowers us through His Holy Spirit to move towards freedom and complete dependence on Him. Paul finishes his Philippians statement by saying, “Forgetting the past…I press on.”
Press on today in your walk with Jesus. Ask Him to show you what needs to be released. Trust Him to give you the power to let go for Him.
PRAYER: Heavenly Father, this verse is a hard one for me. I know there are areas in my life that I’m not ready to give up to You. Please forgive me for that and help me to wisely and in the power of your Spirit, move towards complete dependence on You. Keep me from looking back. Help me to always see you before anyone or anything else. Amen.
Mike Fisk & Built with Grace 