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Search me, O God, and know my heart; test me and know my anxious thoughts. See if there is any offensive way in me, and lead me in the way everlasting. Psalm 139:23-24
What do you see when you look in the mirror? Not a physical piece of shiny glass, what about the spiritual and emotional mirror? Who do you see when no one else is watching? What’s hidden beneath the surface that no one else can see and no one else can understand?
Most of us don’t like to look at ourselves in a mirror (or at least we don’t admit it!). We have a vision of what we want to be like, what we want to look like and all too often a mirror doesn’t ‘reflect’ the vision we’d hoped for.
How we see ourselves in our ‘emotional/spiritual’ mirror will affect how we see ourselves in a physical mirror as well as how we react to others, to adversity and even success. Our vision of self drives our emotions, our spiritual lives and our relationships.
King David knew how fickle each of us can be. Our vision is so affected by how we see ourselves that it can change by the day or by the minute. One adverse event can ruin our whole day or even our lives. That’s why David went to the source of all knowledge for an opinion about himself.
‘Search me’, he says and with that request he gives God ‘permission’ so to speak, to shine a light on every corner of his being. That’s scary stuff! None of us would dare ask that of even our closest friends because we’d be afraid of what they’d find. There are feelings, thoughts, attitudes and painful experiences buried deep within each of us. Some we have tried to cover up with toys, with drugs and addictions and with multiple relationships. Some of the pain we suffer from has become so much a part of us that we no longer even remember why we are hurting. The pain has become ‘normal’.
David went to God for the searching because he knew that God would look upon him with eyes of love and compassion. He will do the same for you. When we let God reveal our deepest, darkest secrets, those hidden pains and fears, we take the first step to true freedom. God doesn’t reveal our hidden places to condemn us. He reveals our hidden places to free us.
John tells us, “For God did not send his Son into the world to condemn the world, but to save the world through him.” (John 3:17) As followers of the Lord Jesus Christ we can be at peace with who we are with all our blemishes, all our bruises and all the ugly scars that we try to hide with emotional make-up. God made you as you are. You are His child. Ask Him to reveal all that you are. Trust Him to do so with compassion, gentleness and love.
PRAYER: Father God. I come to you today with fear. I’m afraid of what you will find in my life if I invite you to search every corner of my being. There are times when I don’t like myself, my past and my present. But I believe you when you say you love me and won’t condemn me. Give me the courage to open every area of my life to you. Remove my feelings of fear, guilt and inadequacy. Forgive me for the harm I’ve caused to myself and others. Free me to live for you through your Spirit. Amen.
“In your anger do not sin”: Do not let the sun go down while you are still angry, and do not give the devil a foothold. Ephesians 4:26-27
All of us get angry from time to time. For some of us anger is a fleeting event in the process of life. Our anger is like a firecracker. Long or short fused, once we reach the ‘boiling point’ we explode. We say what we feel needs to be said or do what needs to be done and then we are finished.
For other people anger is like an iceberg. We may show some emotion on the surface but the true feelings are beneath the surface. People learn to stay away because they know that lurking beneath the surface of our emotions is a dangerous monster ready to rip us apart.
Anger in and of itself is not a sin. Jesus got angry with the religious zealots and the hypocrital Pharisees for the way they twisted God’s law for their own religious benefit. He was angry the day He drove the money changers from the Temple because they had defiled God’s rules on sacrifice.
Others in the Bible grew angry as well. Sometimes their anger was directed at wicked kings and family members. Sometimes their anger and frustration was directed at God. Even God is described as growing angry in relation to sin and to those who taught a ‘religion’ that contradicted His love and concern for mankind.
In most situations, anger is a secondary emotion. It is sub-consciously used as a cover up for guilt, unresolved sin, or fear. When we grow angry it is often because we feel threatened. We get angry at other people because they do or say things that make us feel inferior, unloved or unimportant. We resolve to never let that person hurt us again and never seek resolution.
Paul warns us that while being angry is not a sin, we should not let anger lead us into sin. In any situation we should respond, not react to the person who is attacking us. There are times when our first action must be to remove ourselves from the situation. God never wants us to be abused physically, spiritually or emotionally. Time apart allows both parties to evaluate the situation and work towards resolution, even if resolution includes ending a relationship.
When we are angry we need to resolve that situation as soon as possible. That doesn’t always mean we can go to the person who has made us angry and resolve things. Anger is my choice to react to a situation that I feel threatened by. It is also my choice to release the person that has hurt me by choosing not be in bondage to that person or to anger.
In cases of extreme abuse it may take years to get over the anger and hurt, but Jesus came to heal and free us from the bondage of anger. When we feel attacked, anger can be avoided by simply reassuring ourselves that because of Jesus we are okay. You are a child of the King. No one can change that or take it away from you.
Be angry. But don’t allow the anger to consume you and change who you are. Ask for God’s help in releasing you from anger as soon as it rears its ugly head. Waiting ‘until morning’ may allow Satan to take you captive.
PRAYER: Dear Father. I confess to you that I am filled with anger today. I thank You that You understand far more than anyone else how hurt I am. I want to be released from the anger I feel. Empower me through Your Holy Spirit to live with the confidence that nothing and no one will ever change the fact that I am Your child. Amen.
He himself bore our sins in his body on the tree, so that we might die to sins and live for righteousness; by his wounds you have been healed. 1 Peter 2:24
Normally we think of healing in a positive sense. Healing removes pain and makes us healthy. But for any of us who have ever had surgery we know that sometimes pain is required in order for us to be healthy. It isn’t fun to go through the pain, but we have to do it in order for us to be able to function.
Just as pain is sometimes is necessary for healing in the physical realm, so it is in the spiritual realm. The reality is, the only way to receive spiritual healing is death. In the garden of Eden, when Adam and Eve broke the relationship with God through their sin, He killed a calf, offered a sacrifice and clothed them with the skin of the animal. From that point on Adam and Eve had a renewed relationship with God.
The problem was they still suffered the consequence of their sin. The relationship with God was never the same for Adam and Eve, or their descendants. From that point on sacrifices had to be made for the sins mankind committed. Every sacrifice meant the death of an animal. But those sacrifices were temporary and had to be repeated time after time in order for mankind to enjoy relationship with God.
When Jesus came, all that changed. The poor choices and sins of mankind still plagued the human race. The difference is that One person offered Himself as the perfect sacrifice for ALL of the sins of mankind. The sin I bear is like a cancerous tumor. It’s a fatal disease with no cure. There is no hope for cure except for my death.
But Jesus’ death on the cross and His resurrection from the dead paid the debt for our sin. His wounds heal us from the fatal spiritual disease that threatens to keep us from heaven and fellowship with God. We have a new, healthy spiritual life because of what Jesus did for us on the cross.
Now, imagine that you have suffered from some terrible disease that kept you in a wheelchair. One day a cure was found for your disease and you were free to walk about as normal people. You could run, jump, swim and play just as you’d always hoped you could do. Would you stay in the wheelchair? Of course not! Because of the healing you no longer need it. You are free. You can throw that wheelchair away and never ever think about it again.
In the same way, in the spiritual realm, we are healed. We don’t need to carry the burden of our past with us. Others may say, “Hey, shouldn’t you be in a wheelchair?” But we can say with confidence. NO! I’m free now. None of the things of my past matter. I’ve been healed because of Jesus.
Live life free of your past. Don’t allow the disease of sin to keep you captive any longer. Jesus suffered death so you could have full, abundant life. He sent His Holy Spirit to empower you to live above the effects of the deadly disease of sin.
PRAYER: Heavenly Father. I thank you for the healing and freedom I have in Jesus. I’m forgiven because of His death. He has healed me of my sin. Empower me now to live with the power I have through the Holy Spirit so sin will no longer have dominion in my life. I pray this in Jesus name, Amen.
‘and forgive us our sins, as we have forgiven those who sin against us’. Matthew 6:12 (NLT)
“I forgive you”. Three of the toughest words we will ever say and perhaps the toughest to live out. There are sometimes when forgiveness is easy. Those times when someone does some small infraction that really had no effect on us. They feel far worse than we do. We forgive them, they feel better and that’s the end of it.
It’s those other times when forgiveness is tough. Those times when we’ve been let down by close friends or family. Once is hard, but then it happens over and over again and we begin to doubt their sincerity. They say they are sorry. They say they will try harder or they will ‘never do that again’ but the more they fail the less we believe their words.
There are times forgiveness seems to be completely impossible. You’ve been hurt. The hurt may be physical. The bruises will heal, but the trust has been broken. While physical hurt is painful, the real pain is in the emotions. Emotional scars heal much slower than physical. Sometimes emotional scars never heal. People you meet on the street everyday wear masks and smiles that hide unbearable pain. They are in the coffee shops and restraints. They are in the doctor’s office and the post office. They are in the schools and the churches. They bear the weight of emotional scars and the baggage of not being able to forgive and move on.
Forgiveness is toughest when it isn’t asked for. You’ve been hurt-badly. Once the physical pain is gone the emotional goes on. The perpetrator knows. He/she just doesn’t care. You are left in a pool of pain, sorrow, embarrassment and hurt. Forgiveness certainly isn’t warranted or deserved. It’s not even asked for! But if you don’t forgive, the pain grows like a painful, cancerous growth producing anger, bitterness and hate.
We don’t forgive others because they ask for it or even deserve it. We forgive to free ourselves from the pain. Forgiveness isn’t about them. It’s about you. To forgive the undeserving isn’t about reconciliation, it’s about freedom.
Jesus says we should pray: ‘and forgive us our sins, as we have forgiven those who sin against us’ Matthew 6:12 (NLT). To forgive as we’ve been forgiven! Some forgive conditionally: “If you do this again…”; Others forgive under obligation: “God said I have to forgive you, so I guess I do…”; Others forgive but reserve the right to remind you of this fault at a later, more convenient date.
Jesus says we are to forgive as He does. His forgiveness is complete. All we have to do is come to him, confess our faults and ask forgiveness. Then we move on, trusting His Holy Spirit to empower us to try harder. Sometimes we succeed. Sometimes we struggle and fail. Always we are forgiven by Him.
There are some people who have hurt you deeply. Forgiveness won’t come through your power. It won’t come overnight. It will some as you rely on God to empower you with the ability to let go of the pain caused by others and be free to let go. Forgiving doesn’t make you less of a person, it makes you more like Jesus.
PRAYER: Father God. You know my heart. There are people in my life that have hurt me deeply and continue to do so. I’m angry, I’m frustrated and bitter. I know I should forgive but have no power to do so. I want to be free of this pain. I want to let go and live more like Jesus. I confess my inability to you and ask you to forgive me. Empower me with your Spirit to forgive and live free of this burden. I Jesus name, Amen.
Make every effort to live in peace with all men and to be holy; without holiness no one will see the Lord. See to it that no one misses the grace of God and that no bitter root grows up to cause trouble and defile many. Hebrews 12:14-15
I knew a man who loved to talk about himself and others. When he talked about himself the comments were always positive. He apparently could do no wrong and was an unsung hero in many ways. On the other hand when he talked about others (except of course for those in hearing range) he could always find something wrong with what they did, say, or wore for clothing. No one else measured up to his standards.
Needless to say he didn’t have many friends. We’d sit at lunch during work and hope he didn’t sit at our table. One day he was going on and on about himself when another co-worker, a gentle, soft spoken and well respected believer in Jesus, came into the lunch room. He was still out of earshot when our ‘prophet’ said, “I don’t like him”. I was curious so I asked why he didn’t like that person and he replied, “I don’t know. I just don’t like him. Nice guy though.”
His statement made no sense, as was the case in many of his tirades, but his words stuck with me. The writer to the Hebrews tells us to live at peace with all people as much as is possible. The co-worker that entered the lunchroom that day, I’ll call him Jeff, did nothing to deserve the ‘prophets’ disdain. In fact, the ‘prophet’ even admitted his feelings were unwarranted.
Jeff had done ‘everything right’. He lived the Christian faith in a non-threatening, non-judgmental way. He wasn’t afraid to share his faith but he would far rather share it through actions than through words. He wasn’t always liked by people. But even those who disliked him could find no reason for accusation.
As a Christ-follower we each have an opportunity to share the love and grace of God to others by our actions. We may not always be accepted. Some will point out our weaknesses and failures and completely disregard the positive aspects of who we are. Our goal as Christ-followers is to live in such a way that others may not like us but will have no grounds for their negative feelings about us.
Live in such a way that you are the solution to the bitterness in people’s lives, not the cause.
PRAYER: Father God. I come to you today realizing that there are things in my life that have caused bitterness in the souls of other people. I confess this to you and ask that you would forgive me for the pain I’ve caused others even if they refuse to forgive me. From this day forward empower me with your Spirit to spread grace and love to those around me so that Christ will be glorified in me. In Jesus name I pray, Amen.
Mike Fisk & Built with Grace 