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Then Jesus said, “Come to me, all of you who are weary and carry heavy burdens, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you. Let me teach you, because I am humble and gentle at heart, and you will find rest for your souls. Matthew 11:28-29 (NLT)
During the time that Jesus walked on earth Oxen were valuable for the farmer in order to plow and harvest crops. A good Ox was worth its weight in gold. Because of their value it was important that the Oxen were well cared for. One of the ways this was done was to make sure that they wore well-fitted yokes. An Ox or team of Oxen, with a good wooden yoke could pull a plow or wagon all day long because the stress was placed on the yoke, not the animal.
There is a legend about Jesus and yokes. Everyone knows that his father was a carpenter and no doubt Jesus also learned the trade before He began His ministry at the age of about 30. The legend states that Jesus was an expert craftsman with wood and His specialty was making wooden yokes.
Although it is probably just a legend, the story paints a beautiful picture of Jesus’ concern for us as we journey through the struggles of life. Jesus didn’t discount that we would encounter struggles and burdens in life. In fact, He promises us that we will see tribulation (or trials) as we walk with Him. Sometimes those trials seem to increase as we grow in our relationship with Christ.
Jesus doesn’t say that He will deliver us from the burdens of life. He does say that He will provide a way for us to endure those trials. When storms come, He provides safe haven. When we seem flooded by adversity He provides higher ground. When grief and sorrow attack, He gives peace that passes understanding.
We often struggle with life because the yoke of human endurance and the “I can do it myself” attitude doesn’t ‘fit us well’. It transfers the stress of the situation onto our shoulders and we bear the weight of worry, doubt, despair and shame.
Jesus says ‘Take my yoke upon you’. The yoke of forgiveness, the yoke of grace, the yoke of love. Feel the gentleness of His touch on your life. When we endure the trials of life our bodies may suffer, but with Jesus we experience rest-rest of the soul!
Other people can make us physically and emotionally uncomfortable. They can attack us with lies and shame and guilt about what we do or our past. People can’t attack our soul unless we choose to wear that yoke. Choose today to put on the yoke of Christ’s forgiveness, grace and love. Burdens will come. Some of them very heavy. But God never intended for us to bear them alone. That’s why He sent His Son, Jesus and His Holy Spirit, to give our souls rest.
PRAYER: Dear Jesus. Thank you for the promise that no matter how hard life gets for me, you are always there. Thank you that your yoke is easy and will allow me to bear the burdens of guilt, shame, worry and doubt that seem to attack me on a regular basis. Teach me to rely on You for rest. In Your name I claim rest for my soul even when my body may be filled with physical and emotional pain. Amen.
Praise the LORD. Blessed is the man who fears the LORD, who finds great delight in his commands. His children will be mighty in the land; the generation of the upright will be blessed. Psalm 112:1-2
A tree is known by its fruit. If you walk up to an apple tree there is little chance you will find an orange! Peach trees will not deliver grapefruit! Cherry trees make lousy pear trees. It is both humbling and exciting to realize that according to scripture, just as trees produce fruit according to their heritage, fathers have a huge effect on the way their children turn out.
While it is true that there are some exceptions, in most cases the faith a father exhibits will eventually be shown in the lives of his children. A man that holds tightly to the word of God and builds a relationship with Jesus Christ will have a much better chance to see his children follow in the heritage of faith he leaves behind.
The Psalmist clearly states that the man who ‘finds great delight’ in what God has to say will see his children greatly bless the land. As fathers, each of us is responsible to make sure we are in God’s word daily and praying regularly and specifically for our families. Our children need male role models to show them the importance of daily communication with God. Healthy physical relationships will not happen unless we have first taken care of building a healthy spiritual relationship with our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ.
While Psalm 112 is clear about the necessity of following God’s word for the sake of our children, it is interesting to ‘see’ what isn’t mentioned. There is no mention of the importance of forcing our children to follow a certain set of religious dogmas and/or traditions. In fact, there is no mention of us forcing our children to do anything. The implication is that they learn the importance of walking with God by our example, by the words we speak and the way we treat others, especially their mother.
Another thing that isn’t mentioned here is that we as parents, especially fathers here, are not responsible for making sure our children conform to the mold we have determined they should follow. Our mission as fathers is to provide as many healthy experiences for our children as possible so that they can develop healthy, well rounded lives through diverse experiences.
Being a successful father has nothing to do with the job you have, the amount of money you make, the church you attend or the number of toys in your yard. Being a successful father is measured simply by the relationship you have with God and how that plays out in the lives of your children.
PRAYER: Father God. I thank you for being the ultimate example of fatherhood for me. I confess to you that I’ve let my relationship with you slip and as a result I’ve put my children in danger of spiritual harm. Forgive me for my apathy and distractions. Empower me to draw close to you so that my children will see an example of You in my life through love, grace and patience with them and others. In Jesus name, Amen.
Fathers, do not provoke your children to anger by the way you treat them. Rather, bring them up with the discipline and instruction that comes from the Lord. Ephesians 6:4 (NLT)
Sometimes it’s important to remember that the chapter numbers and verse numbers in the Bible are fairly recent additions. Before that there were no divisions to the books and letters of the Bible. The reader would understand the change in thought processes of the author by wording and grammatical changes much as we do in a novel or other piece of journalism.
When the Apostle Paul was writing to the church in Ephesus he was writing about practical living as Christ followers. The particular section our verse comes from today is a whole section on family living that begins with “And further, submit to one another out of reverence for Christ.” (5:21). Then Paul goes on to give examples to wives, husbands, parents, children and bosses and employees on how to be submissive to each other because of Jesus Christ and our desire to follow Him.
When Paul addresses fathers in Ephesians 6:4 he’s not really telling the rest of us to stop listening. The lesson he is teaching fathers is one each of us should learn to follow. The lesson is basically this. Our actions towards others should never intentionally cause them to be angry.
Discipline has gotten a bad rap in our society because it is often linked with or confused with punishment. The root word of ‘discipline’ is disciple, a word that implies a follower or a set of rules or a person. It is not a ‘forced event’ but a voluntary one. Punishment on the other hand is something that is forced upon a person.
- Punishment can be done in anger and cause permanent damage.
- Discipline is never done in anger and while it can be painful, the pain is temporary.
- Punishment can cause hatred or frustration on the part of the receiver.
- Discipline may cause temporary misunderstanding but eventually the receiver see the value of the ‘rules’.
- Punishment can often be an act of aggression and frustration on the part of the deliverer of the punishment.
- Discipline is done in patience and love.
- Punishment can be administered to protect the person who does the punishment to ‘protect himself’.
- Discipline is always done for the benefit of the receiver, perhaps even at some cost to the person doing the discipling.
- Punishment degrades both parties in the ‘situation’.
- Discipline elevates both parties in the ‘situation’.
- Punishment forces the individual being punished into a mold that may not be in his/her best interest.
- Discipline shapes a person’s character in a way that best fulfills his/her gifts and abilities.
- Punishment changes behavior.
- Discipline grows character.
- Punishment is quick and effective.
- Discipline is time consuming and eternal.
Each of us, no matter what role we play in life will, at some time, be in a position where we are training others for life’s journey. The best way we can do that is to disciple those around us by:
- allowing them to grow at their own pace.
- showing them the way of true life through Jesus Christ.
- Praying that Jesus will change their minds towards Him.
- Patiently determining to love them regardless of the choices they make.
PRAYER: Holy Father. I am a victim of punishment done with good intent but with painful results. As I’ve grown older I’ve tended to follow the same patterns I learned as I grew up. Empower me through your Holy Spirit to love as Jesus loved, disciple as He disciple and help those around me to grow in character as a result of what they see in me. Forgive me for the pain I’ve caused. Heal the scars of my past. Amen.
The Lord gave me this message: “I knew you before I formed you in your mother’s womb. Before you were born I set you apart and appointed you as my prophet to the nations.” Jeremiah 1:4-5 (NLT)
Medical science has certainly changed the way we look at childbirth. In years past the due date, sex of the child and its development were basically a mystery until the day of the child’s birth. Today, through the marvels of technology, we can know almost with a certainty, the sex of the baby, when it will be born and how it’s doing developmentally all while still in the womb!
I never tire of hearing first-time moms and dads tell of that first ultra-sound. Incredible. Here is this new life forming, developing, and growing right before our eyes! The parents can know a lot about this new, precious life long before it enters into our world all through the television screen.
The ability we have as humans to watch the formation of life, almost from conception, makes God’s message to Jeremiah even more amazing. To think that the God of the universe, the creator and sustainer of all life ‘knew me before He formed me’ boggles the mind.
The concept of God ‘knowing me’ is more than a casual acquaintance. Today, with the internet and a plethora of social networking possibilities, it’s possible to ‘know’ hundreds, even thousands of people without really even meeting them. We learn about them from blog posts, or home pages and websites, but never really meet them.
Even in our social circles it is becoming increasingly difficult to ‘intimately know’ those we rub shoulders with every day. Social mobility, economic strain, family concerns and other things hinder us from really knowing each other, and even then it’s humanly impossible to fully understand the complex emotions of anyone else, or ourselves for the matter.
But God tells us, here in Jeremiah and elsewhere, that He KNOWS us. God is intimately connected with our deepest desires, dreams, feelings and thoughts. He feels our pain exactly as we do. He fully understands our frustrations, our anger, and our fears like no one else in the world.
Not only does God fully understand your deepest thoughts and emotions. He made you the way you are. Sometimes people have ‘surprise babies’. Children that weren’t planned or expected. But in God’s eyes there are no ‘surprise babies’. All life is planned carefully and lovingly by His gracious hand. No mistakes. No second thoughts. No regrets. It doesn’t matter what you’ve done, where you’ve come from, who you have hurt or who has hurt you. YOU are His special creation.
As you journey through life there will be plenty of people out there that will point out your weaknesses, remind you of past failures, criticize your current situation and/or offer all sorts of advice about how you should be, what you should change, how you should dress or act. Evaluate everything they say by reminding yourself that you are God’s special creation. He made you with the feelings, emotional make-up, desires and physical traits you have. He loves you just the way you are. There may be areas that need some ‘polishing up’, some changes that need to be made. But YOU are just the person He hoped you would be.
PRAYER: Father God, I’m in awe when I think of what it means that you, the creator/sustainer of the universe knew me intimately before I was even conceived in my mother’s womb. I thank you and praise you for who I am regardless of the flaws others seem to see in me. Empower me by your Spirit to live free of the condemnation of others. Help me to remember that I am your special creation. Forgive me for the times I’ve been unfaithful to myself and to you in how I act or think. Thank you most of all for loving me when I’m not very easy to love. Amen.
Timely advice is lovely, like golden apples in a silver basket. Proverbs 25:11 (NLT)
Saying the right thing at the right time is a priceless gift each of us should strive to receive. I once knew a person who had many good ideas about how things should be done at his place of employment. The problem was that he would often make his suggestions at the worst possible moment. Usually this was during some crisis or problem when emotions were high. While his words were intended to be helpful, they would often have the effect of pouring gasoline on a fire. People would be offended and tempers would flare.
My friend’s situation may be an extreme situation but each of us has experienced the pain of words spoken at the wrong time and place. Sometimes it may have been our own words. Other times words spoken to us.
The message of Proverbs 25:11 is that advice is good and to be treasured, but we each must learn to use our words carefully, choosing the right words for the right time. One of the best ways to do this is to learn how to ‘respond and NOT react’ to a situation. Responding to a situation means we take the time to evaluate exactly what is going on and take into account the emotions of everyone involved in the situation.
When tempers are already at the boiling point or emotions are already high it is often best to wait, if possible, until things have cooled a bit before you speak. There have been times when people have said things to me that, at first, I took offense to, as though they were attacking me personally. When I’m able to step back from the situation it’s easier for me to respond in a way that is less retaliatory. If I have the proper view of who I am in Jesus, then peoples words, even if they are attacking, have less impact on me. Determine within yourself that the words of other people will not affect who I am and how I feel about myself.
Our words can also be helpful in steering people from situations and activities that could harm them. This is especially true for us as parents and grandparents. When we see our children engaging in activities that may be harmful to them it’s very important that we assure them of our love and find positive ways to ‘pass on our wisdom’. Saying things that are derogatory about our children’s/grandchildren’s activities or friends will most likely have an opposite effect that we’d hoped for. Sarcasm and critical words will steer them away from us. Saying “I told you so” will be more destructive than constructive.
Take time to actively listen to others before offering your own advice. Ask questions to make sure you understand exactly where they are coming from. Don’t allow their feelings about you, God or others to influence your reaction. How they ‘feel’ is most likely a symptom of a deeper struggle they are having within themselves. It takes time to heal those wounds. Your words can act either as a salve to soothe the wound or as salt to irritate and inflict further pain. The choice is yours.
PRAYER: Father God, Your Word constantly reminds me that my words are powerful tools or powerful weapons. There are so many times when I’m misunderstood or I say the right thing at the wrong time. I tend to react rather than respond when I’m attacked or things don’t go my way. I let other people’s words affect how I feel about myself. Please empower me with Your Holy Spirit to use the words I speak as a healing salve and to refuse to let other people’s words affect how I feel about me. I am your child. No one and no words can change that! Thank you. Amen.
Mike Fisk & Built with Grace 