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Search me, O God, and know my heart; test me and know my anxious thoughts. See if there is any offensive way in me, and lead me in the way everlasting. Psalm 139:23-24
What do you see when you look in the mirror? Not a physical piece of shiny glass, what about the spiritual and emotional mirror? Who do you see when no one else is watching? What’s hidden beneath the surface that no one else can see and no one else can understand?
Most of us don’t like to look at ourselves in a mirror (or at least we don’t admit it!). We have a vision of what we want to be like, what we want to look like and all too often a mirror doesn’t ‘reflect’ the vision we’d hoped for.
How we see ourselves in our ‘emotional/spiritual’ mirror will affect how we see ourselves in a physical mirror as well as how we react to others, to adversity and even success. Our vision of self drives our emotions, our spiritual lives and our relationships.
King David knew how fickle each of us can be. Our vision is so affected by how we see ourselves that it can change by the day or by the minute. One adverse event can ruin our whole day or even our lives. That’s why David went to the source of all knowledge for an opinion about himself.
‘Search me’, he says and with that request he gives God ‘permission’ so to speak, to shine a light on every corner of his being. That’s scary stuff! None of us would dare ask that of even our closest friends because we’d be afraid of what they’d find. There are feelings, thoughts, attitudes and painful experiences buried deep within each of us. Some we have tried to cover up with toys, with drugs and addictions and with multiple relationships. Some of the pain we suffer from has become so much a part of us that we no longer even remember why we are hurting. The pain has become ‘normal’.
David went to God for the searching because he knew that God would look upon him with eyes of love and compassion. He will do the same for you. When we let God reveal our deepest, darkest secrets, those hidden pains and fears, we take the first step to true freedom. God doesn’t reveal our hidden places to condemn us. He reveals our hidden places to free us.
John tells us, “For God did not send his Son into the world to condemn the world, but to save the world through him.” (John 3:17) As followers of the Lord Jesus Christ we can be at peace with who we are with all our blemishes, all our bruises and all the ugly scars that we try to hide with emotional make-up. God made you as you are. You are His child. Ask Him to reveal all that you are. Trust Him to do so with compassion, gentleness and love.
PRAYER: Father God. I come to you today with fear. I’m afraid of what you will find in my life if I invite you to search every corner of my being. There are times when I don’t like myself, my past and my present. But I believe you when you say you love me and won’t condemn me. Give me the courage to open every area of my life to you. Remove my feelings of fear, guilt and inadequacy. Forgive me for the harm I’ve caused to myself and others. Free me to live for you through your Spirit. Amen.
“In your anger do not sin”: Do not let the sun go down while you are still angry, and do not give the devil a foothold. Ephesians 4:26-27
All of us get angry from time to time. For some of us anger is a fleeting event in the process of life. Our anger is like a firecracker. Long or short fused, once we reach the ‘boiling point’ we explode. We say what we feel needs to be said or do what needs to be done and then we are finished.
For other people anger is like an iceberg. We may show some emotion on the surface but the true feelings are beneath the surface. People learn to stay away because they know that lurking beneath the surface of our emotions is a dangerous monster ready to rip us apart.
Anger in and of itself is not a sin. Jesus got angry with the religious zealots and the hypocrital Pharisees for the way they twisted God’s law for their own religious benefit. He was angry the day He drove the money changers from the Temple because they had defiled God’s rules on sacrifice.
Others in the Bible grew angry as well. Sometimes their anger was directed at wicked kings and family members. Sometimes their anger and frustration was directed at God. Even God is described as growing angry in relation to sin and to those who taught a ‘religion’ that contradicted His love and concern for mankind.
In most situations, anger is a secondary emotion. It is sub-consciously used as a cover up for guilt, unresolved sin, or fear. When we grow angry it is often because we feel threatened. We get angry at other people because they do or say things that make us feel inferior, unloved or unimportant. We resolve to never let that person hurt us again and never seek resolution.
Paul warns us that while being angry is not a sin, we should not let anger lead us into sin. In any situation we should respond, not react to the person who is attacking us. There are times when our first action must be to remove ourselves from the situation. God never wants us to be abused physically, spiritually or emotionally. Time apart allows both parties to evaluate the situation and work towards resolution, even if resolution includes ending a relationship.
When we are angry we need to resolve that situation as soon as possible. That doesn’t always mean we can go to the person who has made us angry and resolve things. Anger is my choice to react to a situation that I feel threatened by. It is also my choice to release the person that has hurt me by choosing not be in bondage to that person or to anger.
In cases of extreme abuse it may take years to get over the anger and hurt, but Jesus came to heal and free us from the bondage of anger. When we feel attacked, anger can be avoided by simply reassuring ourselves that because of Jesus we are okay. You are a child of the King. No one can change that or take it away from you.
Be angry. But don’t allow the anger to consume you and change who you are. Ask for God’s help in releasing you from anger as soon as it rears its ugly head. Waiting ‘until morning’ may allow Satan to take you captive.
PRAYER: Dear Father. I confess to you that I am filled with anger today. I thank You that You understand far more than anyone else how hurt I am. I want to be released from the anger I feel. Empower me through Your Holy Spirit to live with the confidence that nothing and no one will ever change the fact that I am Your child. Amen.
Make every effort to live in peace with all men and to be holy; without holiness no one will see the Lord. See to it that no one misses the grace of God and that no bitter root grows up to cause trouble and defile many. Hebrews 12:14-15
I knew a man who loved to talk about himself and others. When he talked about himself the comments were always positive. He apparently could do no wrong and was an unsung hero in many ways. On the other hand when he talked about others (except of course for those in hearing range) he could always find something wrong with what they did, say, or wore for clothing. No one else measured up to his standards.
Needless to say he didn’t have many friends. We’d sit at lunch during work and hope he didn’t sit at our table. One day he was going on and on about himself when another co-worker, a gentle, soft spoken and well respected believer in Jesus, came into the lunch room. He was still out of earshot when our ‘prophet’ said, “I don’t like him”. I was curious so I asked why he didn’t like that person and he replied, “I don’t know. I just don’t like him. Nice guy though.”
His statement made no sense, as was the case in many of his tirades, but his words stuck with me. The writer to the Hebrews tells us to live at peace with all people as much as is possible. The co-worker that entered the lunchroom that day, I’ll call him Jeff, did nothing to deserve the ‘prophets’ disdain. In fact, the ‘prophet’ even admitted his feelings were unwarranted.
Jeff had done ‘everything right’. He lived the Christian faith in a non-threatening, non-judgmental way. He wasn’t afraid to share his faith but he would far rather share it through actions than through words. He wasn’t always liked by people. But even those who disliked him could find no reason for accusation.
As a Christ-follower we each have an opportunity to share the love and grace of God to others by our actions. We may not always be accepted. Some will point out our weaknesses and failures and completely disregard the positive aspects of who we are. Our goal as Christ-followers is to live in such a way that others may not like us but will have no grounds for their negative feelings about us.
Live in such a way that you are the solution to the bitterness in people’s lives, not the cause.
PRAYER: Father God. I come to you today realizing that there are things in my life that have caused bitterness in the souls of other people. I confess this to you and ask that you would forgive me for the pain I’ve caused others even if they refuse to forgive me. From this day forward empower me with your Spirit to spread grace and love to those around me so that Christ will be glorified in me. In Jesus name I pray, Amen.
The Lord gave me this message: “I knew you before I formed you in your mother’s womb. Before you were born I set you apart and appointed you as my prophet to the nations.” Jeremiah 1:4-5 (NLT)
Medical science has certainly changed the way we look at childbirth. In years past the due date, sex of the child and its development were basically a mystery until the day of the child’s birth. Today, through the marvels of technology, we can know almost with a certainty, the sex of the baby, when it will be born and how it’s doing developmentally all while still in the womb!
I never tire of hearing first-time moms and dads tell of that first ultra-sound. Incredible. Here is this new life forming, developing, and growing right before our eyes! The parents can know a lot about this new, precious life long before it enters into our world all through the television screen.
The ability we have as humans to watch the formation of life, almost from conception, makes God’s message to Jeremiah even more amazing. To think that the God of the universe, the creator and sustainer of all life ‘knew me before He formed me’ boggles the mind.
The concept of God ‘knowing me’ is more than a casual acquaintance. Today, with the internet and a plethora of social networking possibilities, it’s possible to ‘know’ hundreds, even thousands of people without really even meeting them. We learn about them from blog posts, or home pages and websites, but never really meet them.
Even in our social circles it is becoming increasingly difficult to ‘intimately know’ those we rub shoulders with every day. Social mobility, economic strain, family concerns and other things hinder us from really knowing each other, and even then it’s humanly impossible to fully understand the complex emotions of anyone else, or ourselves for the matter.
But God tells us, here in Jeremiah and elsewhere, that He KNOWS us. God is intimately connected with our deepest desires, dreams, feelings and thoughts. He feels our pain exactly as we do. He fully understands our frustrations, our anger, and our fears like no one else in the world.
Not only does God fully understand your deepest thoughts and emotions. He made you the way you are. Sometimes people have ‘surprise babies’. Children that weren’t planned or expected. But in God’s eyes there are no ‘surprise babies’. All life is planned carefully and lovingly by His gracious hand. No mistakes. No second thoughts. No regrets. It doesn’t matter what you’ve done, where you’ve come from, who you have hurt or who has hurt you. YOU are His special creation.
As you journey through life there will be plenty of people out there that will point out your weaknesses, remind you of past failures, criticize your current situation and/or offer all sorts of advice about how you should be, what you should change, how you should dress or act. Evaluate everything they say by reminding yourself that you are God’s special creation. He made you with the feelings, emotional make-up, desires and physical traits you have. He loves you just the way you are. There may be areas that need some ‘polishing up’, some changes that need to be made. But YOU are just the person He hoped you would be.
PRAYER: Father God, I’m in awe when I think of what it means that you, the creator/sustainer of the universe knew me intimately before I was even conceived in my mother’s womb. I thank you and praise you for who I am regardless of the flaws others seem to see in me. Empower me by your Spirit to live free of the condemnation of others. Help me to remember that I am your special creation. Forgive me for the times I’ve been unfaithful to myself and to you in how I act or think. Thank you most of all for loving me when I’m not very easy to love. Amen.
And so blessing and cursing come pouring out of the same mouth. Surely, my brothers and sisters, this is not right! James 3:10 (NLT)
We may not realize how much our ‘talk’ tells others about our ‘walk’! A friend of mine told me of a job he had in college. While he was very strong in his faith, he wasn’t the type of person to ‘push his beliefs’ on other people. In the course of conversation he was never afraid or ashamed of sharing his faith, but he was rarely the type of person who would start a conversation with his faith. He’d seen too many people get pushed off by the ‘Bible-thumping, religious zealots’.
After three weeks on the job he smashed his finger while trying to dislodge a part from the machine he was operating. As he tells the story, he pulled his hand back and, ‘in his mind’ said a couple words that he probably shouldn’t have said, then shook it off and went back to work.
A couple minutes later a co-worker came up to him. He’d befriended this guy during breaks and always walked away with his ears ringing from the expletives that came from this man’s mouth. It seemed like every other word was a swear word or a cuss word. The man mentioned that he’d been watching my friend during the episode that just happened. He said something like, “You know, I did the same thing last week and swore a blue streak. You didn’t say anything. I got to thinking I’ve never heard a bad word from you. What’s with that?”
My friend shared openly that because of his faith in Jesus Christ he’d made a decision that he would never use language that would embarrass or offend Christ, no matter what the situation. The man was shocked and said, “I’ve known lots of Bible thumpers, but they still swear when things don’t go their way or else they send me on some guilt trip for the way I talk.”
The men went back to work but a friendship had begun. Over the ensuing weeks and months the man’s language became less intense (at least while my friend was around), and he even attended church with my friend a couple times. Several months later he accepted Christ as his personal savior.
Whenever my friend tells this story, he adds how thankful he is that he guarded his mouth that day. Because of that, he was able to bring Jesus to someone else.
Each of us needs to constantly remember that our words speak much louder to others about who we are. The way we react to the crabby clerk in the store, or the ‘inept’ server in the restaurant is a testimony of what Jesus means to us.
James tells us to guard what we say. The same lips that sing praises to God on Sunday should never ridicule or verbally attack others during the week! Guard what you say and how you say it. You never know who may be watching and listening to you.
PRAYER: Father God, I confess to you that it’s way too easy for my lips to slip. Sometimes I say words that are not pleasing to you. Other times I’m critical of others, either to their face or behind their back. I realize now that this isn’t pleasing to you. Forgive me for the struggle I have with words. Empower me through your Spirit to speak gracefully to and about others for your sake. In Jesus name I pray. Amen.
Mike Fisk & Built with Grace 