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No, the Lord’s delight is in those who fear him, those who put their hope in his unfailing love. Psalms 147:11
God loves when we can’t.
A young man came home from school one day full of anger, defeat and rejection. When his dad asked him what was wrong he shared, in tears, that he was about to be cut from his high school basketball team. He would be evaluated the next day and the coaches would decide.
His dad, a former coach himself, took him outside and played basketball with him for a couple hours. They talked. They laughed and in between times the father shared pointers on basketball…and life.
Later, as the son headed off to bed, the father put his arm around him and told him, “Son, tomorrow is a big day for you, but not the biggest challenge you’ll face in life. Know this, I don’t love you because of your basketball skills. I don’t love you because of your grades. I don’t love you because of your popularity. I love you because you are my child and nothing will ever change that.”
The next day, the son returned home in a good mood.
The father looked at him and said, “You must have made the team?”
“No,” the son replied, “But I know now that my value isn’t caught up in who I am, but in whose I am.”
And so it is in life. Don’t allow the expectations and circumstances that surround you to define you. Your worth isn’t in what you do, or your accomplishments or your status. God takes value in you because you are first and foremost of all made in his image. His love never fails.
Fearing the Lord isn’t being afraid of his judgment, fearing the Lord is being in awe of his love and grace.
Give your burdens to the Lord, and he will take care of you. He will not permit the godly to slip and fall. Psalms 55:22
One of the things I’ve always struggled with is asking for help. Asking for help is a sign of weakness. Asking for help can be placing a burden on someone else. Asking for help implies I don’t know what to do next.
All of those things aren’t necessarily true but that is how my brain works if I let it. The truth is, God created us for relationship. God created us for community. God created us to help each other bear the burdens of our lives.
That’s why, from the very beginning he states, ‘It isn’t good for mankind to go through life without a helper.’ (Genesis 2:18) We normally think of that in relation to the creation of woman, which is true, but in the broader sense, God knew we needed community.
We need to love on one another. We need to bear the burden’s of one another. We need to pray for one another. We need to encourage one another.
While all that’s true, there are some burdens others have that, in reality we can’t bear. We can pray for each other. We can do all sorts of other things to lift each other up, but the reality is some burdens can only be placed on the shoulders of Jesus, who is more than willing to take them on.
The burden of rejection from people you thought loved you. The burden of misunderstanding when you have done your best. The burden of unmet expectations. the burden of blame. The burden of criticism. I think you get the picture. Add your own burden to that list.
The reality is, even the most well-meaning people will reject you. But Jesus never will. NEVER. He doesn’t ask us to cast our burdens on him, it’s a command! You will be misunderstood, attacked and abandoned by some, but never by Jesus.
Turn to me and have mercy, for I am alone and in deep distress. Psalm 25:16 (NLT)
I don’t get to travel often. In fact it’s rare that I spend a night away from my family. One on occasion though I remember sitting in a hotel room 1500 miles from home. I was there for a conference that I’d looked forward to for months. I was basking in the warm sunshine of the Sunbelt while my family endured the cold winter of the north.
It was a great time. The sessions were everything I hoped for. The networking I did was fulfilling. Yet, the entire time I was there I battled the plague of loneliness. Don’t get me wrong. I was far from being alone. I was a phone call or text message from my loved ones; I was in a conference with loving and accepting people. But feelings of loneliness have nothing to do with the location you are in or the amount of people you are around. In fact, loneliness is worst when you are in a crowd.
One recent study suggests that 60 million people in the United States are affected by loneliness. The late Robin Williams once said, “I used to think that the worst thing in life was to end up all alone. It’s not. The worst thing in life is to end up with people who make you feel all alone.” But it’s not just people that make you feel alone. One definition of loneliness is “feeling unhappy because of being separated from other people.” Feelings of failure, inadequacy, rejection, poor self-image, anger and many other feelings can lead us to withdraw into the harsh world of loneliness.
Sometimes we are separated from others because of physical distance, as I was at that conference, but other times we are separated from others emotionally. We’ve all been there. Maybe you are there now. No one seems to understand your feelings. Even your closest friends seem intent on ‘fixing you’ rather than just listening to you and letting you sort things out yourself.
While there is no easy answer to the severe feelings of loneliness, I take some comfort in the Bible and in particular the book of Psalms. Written by a man who failed as a father, leader, lover, husband and friend, David writes from the heart about his struggles with the emotional part of life.
In Psalm 25:16, he pleads with God to, “Turn to me and have mercy, for I am alone and in deep distress.” You can almost hear the anguish in his voice. Imagine that. At the time he was the most powerful and popular king his nation had ever had. Yet in spite of his power and popularity (the two things we all hope for) he felt complete and udder distress.
David knew that the only place to get relief for his soul was from God. In the same way, the only real way to battle the feelings of loneliness we have is by going to God. Many may say, ‘Why God? How can he understand how I feel?”
The reason God can understand how we feel is because his Son, Jesus Christ, endured loneliness and rejection more than anyone else. His family thought he was crazy. Church leaders constantly hounded him, trying to catch him in some lie so they could kill him (which they did eventually), His friends abandoned him in his hour of deepest need and never did fully understand him. The ultimate rejection, however, came from his own Father.
In our western, 21st century culture we don’t understand the significance of this event, but in the book of Matthew (Matthew 27:45-46) we’re told that God himself ‘turned his back on Jesus’. When God ‘forsook’ Jesus, it was like turning his back on Jesus. In that culture, when a father turned his back on his son it was the deepest and strongest symbol of rejection that could happen. At the point of Jesus’ deepest point of need, even his father rejected him and left him all alone. It’s no wonder some of Jesus’ last words were (to paraphrase) ‘Dad! Why have even you turned away from me? You were all I had and now you are gone!”
Are you feeling completely rejected? Do you feel like no one else cares? Do you feel like your failures are so great that no one can ever accept you again? There’s only one person who knows exactly how you feel because he went through the same feelings. That person is Jesus Christ and he anxiously reaches out to you to comfort, forgive and most of all be your closest friend.
Dear Jesus, you know better than anyone how I’m feeling right now. The feelings of loneliness and failure overwhelm me. Please help me to feel your presence in my life right now and especially during those times I need a friend. Amen.
Therefore, since we are surrounded by such a huge crowd of witnesses to the life of faith, let us strip off every weight that slows us down, especially the sin that so easily trips us up. And let us run with endurance the race God has set before us. We do this by keeping our eyes on Jesus, the champion who initiates and perfects our faith. Because of the joy awaiting him, he endured the cross, disregarding its shame. Now he is seated in the place of honor beside God’s throne. Hebrews 12:1-2 (NLT)
Why did Jesus die? Theologians will tell you that he needed to die as a perfect sacrifice of our sins, and that’s true. We all were lost, subject to our evil sin nature, and destined to eternity separated from God.
The only way to bridge that gap was to have some person who was sinless die on behalf of the world, and that person was, by his choice Jesus Christ. He died so we might live.
But tucked away in Hebrews we find another reason that Jesus died. This reason was, perhaps the motivation for why he died. Jesus died because he knew the pain he would endure on earth would be well worth the joy he’d receive when all things were accomplished.
Joy? You may say? What joy? Was the joy he was looking forward to the joy of living in heaven for eternity? I think not. After all, heaven was his home and the universe was his playground.
Was the joy he was looking forward to the joy of living with his father? Again, I think not. Why would he leave his father on his own will and suffer hardship so he could look forward to being with his father? Doesn’t make sense to me.
Jesus Christ left heaven, endured the shame, ridicule, loneliness, rejection, hate and anger because he was looking forward to the joy of living with you. Yep, you are his joy, his crown, the one he longs to spend time with.
Any of us can endure a little hardship and pain if we know that the end result is better than the present circumstances. Take exercise for example, there may be a few who really enjoy exercise, but for most of us we struggle to get ourselves onto the running path or into the gym. It’s much easier to say, “I’ll start tomorrow.”
But if we want to enjoy good health we exercise. Exercise is good for the heart, prevents or at least puts off some diseases, and can even deter the aging process. The end result is worth the present pain and discomfort.
Jesus knew before he left heaven the first time what life would be like for him on earth. He knew the pain he’d endure for you. Jesus knew, before he left heaven every single mistake you’d make. Every cross or profane word. Every affair. Every visit to the porn sight. Every time you’d mock him. Still, he looked forward to the day he could spend eternity with you. The joy far outweighed the pain.
PRAYER: Lord Jesus, thank you for loving me so much. Things here on earth get very painful. I don’t understand why I do what I do or have to go through what I am going through. Help me to endure all of this with the expectation I have of spending eternity with you. In your name, Amen.
Mike Fisk & Built with Grace 